25 April was ‘Parental Alienation Awareness Day’
25 April was ‘Parental Alienation Awareness Day’
25 April is the official ‘Parental Alienation Awareness Day’. This is a term that many people will never have heard before, but many children and their parents will have experienced.
Parental Alienation (PAS) exists in many forms and the harm that is does to parents – and to the children – is inestimable.
International parenting expert Rosalind Sedacca of Child Centered Divorce explains that: “Parental Alienation is the darkest, most damaging consequence of divorce done wrong. It’s impact can last a lifetime — and it can boomerang on you in the years to come.”
If you want some scary statistics: In Psychology Today, Edward Kruk has written of 11-15% of the children of divorcing parents suffering the effects of implacable hostility – which is where one parent refuses to willingly allow access to the children by the other parent. In the UK, where roughly 250,000 divorces are granted every year, that estimate would equate to some 50,000-75,000 children every year.
PAS is a form of child abuse in many people’s opinion – but there are much more subtle and common forms of alienation, and not always against the non-resident parent.
This mother shares her story in a poignant short film which will resonate with many co-parents and children.
The Government pushing companies to better support employees through divorce
Iain Duncan-Smith was reported in The Telegraph saying that the Government was going to “push” companies into becoming better at identifying these problems and offering help before they get worse to help keep their employees in work.
But how can this be achieved?
As the UK’s Alternative Divorce Guide and promoter of dispute resolution professionals via the Alternative Divorce Directory, I wanted to create a solution.
The CoParenting in a Box resource is sharing videos like the one above with the help of employee benefits provider Perkbox – the first time that direct resources and support for parents has been shared with UK employees to empower them to reduce the amount of conflict that family separation can spark. Conflict that directly effects the productivity of the workforce.
300,000 UK employees – many of whom will be ‘co-parenting’ – will be able to access the online ‘box’ collection of key video interviews with experts, downloadable resources and complimentary 1-1 expert advice, all available within CoParenting in a Box. Videos include those of young adults explaining the significant affects of one of their parents making them hate the other parent – or simply disrespect them – on there ability to relate healthily to others and to themselves in later life.
Accessible online for a very low cost (I am determined to keep this resource as affordable as possible to every parent who splits in the UK) – the ‘box’ is also available at no charge via trusted partners like Perkbox. Other organisations on the Partnership Page are Resolution, National Family Mediation, Families Need Fathers and Voices in the Middle.
Most of the content has been created specifically to educate parents, and includes informative videos from experts such as Mediator and Arbitrator Nadia Beckett, who often gets asked by clients: “How do I get to see my children?”. Her advice is to be careful about rushing off to court to resolve these issues, a course of action that can seriously backfire.
Videos for co-parenting education and empowerment
I am delighted to be one of the participants in the forthcoming 1001 Critical Days Manifesto “Tomorrow’s Child” exhibition at the Houses of Parliament – which brings scientists and artists together to raise awareness about the importance of the early days of conception and childhood to future health and wellbeing – using video as my medium.
I love to collect real stories that when shared, empower others. Whether that is a story shared by a family mediator or collaborative lawyer about the sometimes disastrous effects of battling for child custody through the courts, to a mother sharing her experience of her child’s father ‘saying bad things’ about her. Videos are easy to watch on mobile devices and shared stories are powerful ways to educate and inspire others.
It’s just no good waiting until people are in the middle of divorce to ‘educate’ them about how not to make a huge mess of it all. My hope is that via proactive employers and partnerships, together we can make that key knowledge accessible and easily available way before the madness of divorce and breakup kick in.
CoParenting in a Box is available direct from www.co-parentinginabox.co.uk
The Partnership Page – which includes innovative employee benefits provider Perkbox – is here: https://startingovershow.com/partnership-page-coparenting-in-a-box/
6th March 2022
4th June 2023
Related Articles
Your Relationship Guru: Celia Conrad
Your Relationship Guru: Celia Conrad Helping you heal from the pain of break-up and personal loss and create positive lasting change. Celia Conrad is a relationship expert. She has a diploma in relationship coaching, is an accredited break-up and divorce coach practitioner and master practitioner (specialising in domestic abuse), a certified grief educator and certified […]
Read MoreParenting Conflict Resolution Expert: Jenni Rock Coaching
Jenni Rock Coaching Parenting Conflict Resolution Expert I help those parents to escape the war that started with their Divorce Proceedings I spent 15 years living with a very challenging person who taught me the kind of relationship I never wanted to have again. Once that ended, we had to co-parent as best we could. […]
Read MoreDoes your Workplace have a Separating Families Policy for Divorcing Parents?
Did you know that in a 2014 study for the Nashville Business Journal, they found that in the 6 months leading up to and during the year of a divorce, an employee’s productivity is reduced by 40% and will suffer on some level for the next 7 years. Not only that, but there is an impact on the […]
Read MoreInfidelity? It’s none of my business
The shock of the breakup was so sudden, so extreme, that normal behaviour would have seemed inappropriate The events that lead up to it should have left clues, but they didn’t register: The bank letters addressed in his name that I didn’t open because I’d learned that it was, apparently, none of my […]
Read MoreSuzy’s Story
A Strange Gift: Unplanned Solo Parenting It’s a January morning in 2003 and I can’t bring myself to take the kids to school. What will I say when someone asks me “How are you?” The answer, you see, is just not the stuff of polite conversation. “W E L L… My partner of […]
Read Morewhat is family arbitration?
Family arbitration can be a powerful tool in the peace toolbox, whether you are divorcing in the UK, US, Australia, Canada – or anywhere else arbitration exists. Compared to going to court, arbitration – also known as having a ‘private judge’ – saves the money and a whole load of time. What’s really important, is […]
Read Morewhy should I do a DIY divorce?
Online divorce or – even cheaper – just going to get the paperwork from the courts and doing it all yourself – is the least expensive way to get a divorce, providing neither party is going to disagree with any aspect of the divorce. In other words, if you have no complicated assets – like pensions […]
Read Morewhat is DIY divorce?
There are two varieties: DIY out of court – which means you get the necessary paperwork from your local family courthouse, fill it in, submit the forms and if both of you agree on everything then hey presto, it’s all done and dusted. Of course you will need to wait two years after an official separation […]
Read More