Ex’s bday and time with the child
Posted By: Daniela on 04/04/2023 at 22:08
We discussed in the last mediation about time with our child on the parent’s bday. Mom’s bday falls on dad’s time, our son will be at school until 3:30pm, I will be at work until 4pm. Due to pick our child up at 5:30pm ( as a normal pick up day at 5:30pm). So i am not asking for extra time as my time starts at pick up on that day, for 5 days anyway)
This year, ex’s bday falls on my time (Tue- Sun) with our child (a Thursday), 2 days after my bday(the Tue), and it’s also a school day, and continues with my weekend.
I suggested in mediation that dad can have the child after school from 3:30pm till 5:30pm ( normal exchange time).
Dad is refusing saying he wants more time to take our son out for a meal and he won’t have time to return by 5:30pm and he wants to treat the day as a “holiday” and to keep the child overnight and take him to school in the morning, and I will pick up after school the next day.
My reason for sticking to 5:30pm for dad to drop off back to me is:
– it is a normal school day and i need our son back for his supper at 6pm and bedtime at 8pm with me (dad is normally delaying these by at around 1 hr when in his time)
– dad has not made a real effort to stick to the agreement on me picking our son on time, delays by 10min or more if i don’t go to his flat door to knock, and does not have all the things ready that our son needs bring with him, and our son should be dressed and out waiting for me , but he never makes him ready, and does not bring him out and discussed in mediation (i have to go and knock at his door)….
– he can take our son out the weekend after, when it’s dad’s weekend, as it’s not a child’s party….it’s an adult bday and i do not see the benefit of this change to his bedtime time when it’s a school day.
– it’s my time with our son as scheduled, and i think 2 hrs is reasonable for dad to spent time with our son on dad’s bday.
– if I give in for dad to have our son overnight, it might be a ground for dad to break other agreements in the future, or he can say: “If I’ve done it for my bday, I can do it for other occasions too”….
What do you think? What shall i do?
Am i reasonable?