Mark Carney – Dealing with Bullies in Divorce

How Mark Carney’s outsmarting of Trump shows us how to deal with bullies in divorce

In her podcast episode “Canada STRIKES BACK — Trump’s Trade War BACKFIRES, TRIGGERS Global Fallout”,  Rachel Maddow relates how Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney has outsmarted the President of the United States, Donald Trump. Carney has demonstrated how to deal with bullies.

Maddow sums up the situation as “the divorce is final, and Canada got the house.” Her report resonated with me as being very relevant to those who divorce a narcissistic bullying spouse.

There is a deeply held belief that narcissistic spouses are omnipotent and the victim often feels powerless. Yet governments cow-towing to Trump’s mafia rule of the US have been shown by Carney that there are viable ways to deal with bullies, that don’t involve long expensive battles or angry retorts.

Just a good strategy and a determined focus on implementing it.

Which is why “Every single country that has ever been bullied or threatened with American tariffs is taking notes. They are watching Canada succeed at building a completly alternative model.”

In my Fair Settlement Summit divorce strategy, I map out an alternative model that allows those divorcing even a Trumpian-style spouse to get the financials wrapped up, not allowing their spouse to derail them. And if they try – it can cost them dearly.

A position of strength comes from a mindset, a realisation that you do in fact hold some of the cards, and like Mr Carney, how you choose to play them is critical.

“The new global playbook is simple. Do not retaliate. Do not send negotiators.”

For those who are aware that I essentially ‘bootcamp’ people for dispute resolution, don’t be fooled by the language. When you are dealing with a bully, mediation is still a powerful part of the overall strategy (laid out in detail in my Fair Settlement Summit) – but you are not there to ‘negotiate’ in the usual sense of the word. You are there to cut a deal based on the core choices you present.

You offer a couple of options, and you put forward a strong argument backed up by facts and figures. And if that doesn’t get the response you need, the next stage is also baked-in to the strategy to keep you out of court.

If your spouse is crazy enough to force court, they will most likely end up paying your costs as well as their own, because that is also baked-in to the strategy.

Some will tell you that getting costs allocated in a divorce finance case is very unlikely. That is true – if you don’t follow a viable strategy. How many countries could have done what Canada has done yet failed to do so? But now they see the way forward. And what is key, is that it is “not because Canada decided to be hostile or mean”.

Maddow relates how: “Carney did not give angry pounding the podium speeches. He did not call Donald Trump names on the internet. He did not engage in the theatrical reality television back ad forth that cable news thrives on. He just acted quietly, strategically, and flawlessly effectively.

When faced with a bully in a divorce situation, it can be all too easy to give in. To over-compromise. Or to fight fire with fire, spending thousands on legal fees that often make everything worse.

But with the right strategy and mindset in place, it is possible to act “quietly, strategically, and flawlessly effectively” – and to get the finances done and dusted without years of fighting and eye-watering costs.

Access Rachel Maddow’s podcast here: https://youtu.be/BX-Wo55H4JU?si=4Ec0CC95UN0zawPR