Divorce First Aid for friends and co-workers

Divorce First Aid for friends and co-workers

10 simple and immediate tools to keep handy in your Divorce First Aid Kit, so that you can steer your family, friends and work colleagues away from an adversarial divorce:

 

ACONITE1/ Homeopathic Arnica and Aconite

Elizabeth Gilbert wrote in  Eat, Pray, Love : “I didn’t want to destroy anything or anybody. I just wanted to slip quietly out the back door, without causing any fuss or consequences, and then not stop running until I reached Greenland.”

 

But there are consequences when friends, family or work colleagues travel the journey of divorce or family breakup.  And there is always a bit of a fuss.

Shock is the first stage you go through in divorce – so you may notice friends, family and work colleagues behaving as if “it hasn’t quite registered yet”, or they appear to be walking through a constant fog and to not really be their usual selves.  It’s important to recognise this and not to expect the same level of performance. 

Divorce is a form of bereavement, with the same intensity of emotional and psychological effects.

Arnica is useful for all those bumps and accidents that may increase when a person is in this state of shock and confusion.  But it won’t heal a bruised heart.  However, homeopathic Aconite helped me with the shock of my own family separation, and other remedies from my Homeopath helped me deal with constant weaping.  Help comes often from sources you wouldn’t expect, so stay open to what can help those divorcing friends and colleagues, whatever form it takes, and don’t let your own prejudices or judgements get in the way.

According to a study done by the American Journal of Psychiatry, blood pressure and cholesterol levels rise with divorce and the risk of heart disease and coronary failure increases sharply.  Divorced men end up with at least twice as high a risk of suicide as their married counterparts. 

So be aware of that amongst colleagues at work.  For example: If you are going out – invite them to come along.  If they don’t accept, at least they’ve been asked.  Like bereavement, divorce tends to isolate people, because other people don’t know what to say or do.  Please overcome your awkwardness – it could be a matter of life or death.

(First published in the Winter issue of JUNO – http://www.junomagazine.com. Articles continued in the Spring issue of JUNO, available from 1 March – order now at https://shop.junopublishing.co.uk/)

 

BWsmallerSuzy Miller is the Alternative Divorce Guide and creator of http://www.LivingTogetherAgreement.com and Starting Over Shows.

 

requestform_DivorceFirstAid

suzyMiller

Creator of Best Way To Divorce. International Divorce Divorce Strategist and TEDx Speaker.
Member since:
6th March 2022
Last Login:
15th June 2024

Related Articles

Sue Lee Hypnotherapy

Sue Lee Hypnotherapy Your Catalyst for Change I am the lady who takes away the pain – whether it’s mental, emotional or physical.   Divorce and family separation hurts. That pain can be emotional. It can be confusion over your identity and self-esteem. The trauma can even manifest as physical pain. As a dedicated Hypnotherapist, […]

Read More
4 Min Read

Inner Lyght Evolution: Sarah C. Langford

Read More
4 Min Read

Schools need to support teachers through family separation.

Read More
4 Min Read

I'm doing all the parenting admin and my Ex contributes no money - but still wants half my assets!

Do you have the main responsibilities for the practicalities of parenting (buying clothes/making sure uniform is washed/dinner money) post divorce? So called 50/50 co-parenting still usually means one parent is responsible for the everyday admin. Also – there is one parent who can’t just suddenly get a full time job miles away because they are […]

Read More
4 Min Read

Your Relationship Guru: Celia Conrad

Your Relationship Guru: Celia Conrad Helping you heal from the pain of break-up and personal loss and create positive lasting change. Celia Conrad is a relationship expert. She has a diploma in relationship coaching, is an accredited break-up and divorce coach practitioner and master practitioner (specialising in domestic abuse), a certified grief educator and certified […]

Read More
4 Min Read

Parenting Conflict Resolution Expert: Jenni Rock Coaching

Jenni Rock Coaching Parenting Conflict Resolution Expert I help those parents to escape the war that started with their Divorce Proceedings I spent 15 years living with a very challenging person who taught me the kind of relationship I never wanted to have again. Once that ended, we had to co-parent as best we could. […]

Read More
4 Min Read

Does your Workplace have a Separating Families Policy for Divorcing Parents?

Did you know that in a 2014 study for the Nashville Business Journal, they found that in the 6 months leading up to and during the year of a divorce, an employee’s productivity is reduced by 40% and will suffer on some level for the next 7 years. Not only that, but there is an impact on the […]

Read More
4 Min Read

Infidelity? It’s none of my business

The shock of the breakup was so sudden, so extreme, that normal behaviour would have seemed inappropriate     The events that lead up to it should have left clues, but they didn’t register: The bank letters addressed in his name that I didn’t open because I’d learned that it was, apparently, none of my […]

Read More
4 Min Read

Suzy’s Story

A Strange Gift: Unplanned Solo Parenting   It’s a January morning in 2003 and I can’t bring myself to take the kids to school. What will I say when someone asks me “How are you?” The answer, you see, is just not the stuff of polite conversation.   “W E L L… My partner of […]

Read More
4 Min Read

How to deal with the 7 stages of relationship breakdown recovery

Read More
4 Min Read