5 Fear Reasons That Stop You From Divorcing*
5 Fear Reasons That Stop You From Divorcing*
Relationships evolve and vary. Sometimes,l they are happy. But sometimes, they can drag you down. When this happens, getting a fresh start in your love could be the best thing for you. It is a daunting step to take. So, naturally, you find yourself looking at excuses to prevent the inevitable.
Yet, in many situations, not divorcing could be a bad decision for your mental health, happiness, self-esteem, and emotional stability. There may be reasons that can make the legal separation more stressful, yet you are not gaining any peace of mind by remaining in a relationship that makes you unhappy.
#1. I could try to spice things up
You’d be surprised to know how many individuals think they can save their marriage by spicing things up. You can always make the relationship more exciting. Yet, the right time for it is before you fall out of love. There is nothing to gain from spicing up your relationship when you have already grown apart. It becomes a waste of your time and energy, especially if your partner may not want to try to change the routine as much as you do.
#2. Foreign-born partners worry about immigration status
A lot of couples in which one partner was born abroad struggle with the idea of divorce. Foreign-born partners worry a lot about their immigration status and right to stay in the country after a divorce. The truth is that you can’t stay unhappily married to guarantee your right to remain. In fact, according to immigration law, a marriage may not be enough to grant you this right. Indeed, you need to apply for indefinite leave to remain, which will, in turn, give you the right to apply for a British passport. Getting married can contribute to shortening the period you need to have been in the country before applying for the right to stay. Yet, you can apply for a visa in the meantime to prolong your stay.
#3. We bought a house together
Buying a property and signing a mortgage loan together makes your home a marriage asset. In a divorce, sharing a property can a tricky. However, if selling isn’t an option, there are other alternatives you and your former spouse can take. You can make it part of the settlement or ask the court to decide if you can’t come to a decision. A lot of divorced couples agree to let one partner live in the house until the children turn 18, for instance.
#4. I’m too old for this
Age is never an excuse. Nobody is too old to find love. The desire to find someone special remains with you. After a divorce, you are emotionally mature and experienced, which can make it easier to be objective when you meet someone new.
#5. I worry about loneliness
Loneliness is always going to be part of the story. However, fear of loneliness should not affect your decision. Staying with someone when you are not happy together is not the answer to loneliness. It is the cause.
In conclusion, fears can affect your perception of your relationship. Being afraid of what could happen if you divorce can make you consider staying in an unhappy relationship. But those worries can be resolved. So don’t let them stop you from finding your path.
* contributed post
suzyMillerCreator of Best Way To Divorce. International Divorce Divorce Strategist and TEDx Speaker.
6th March 2022
29th November 2023
Sue Lee Hypnotherapy
Sue Lee Hypnotherapy Your Catalyst for Change As a dedicated Hypnotherapist, Life, Health & Wellness Coach, I am devoted to guiding individuals on their journey towards self discovery, personal growth, and well-being. With a holistic approach to healing, I integrate the powerful techniques of Hypnosis, NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming), EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), and Coaching to […]Read More
I'm doing all the parenting admin and my Ex contributes no money - but still wants half my assets!
Do you have the main responsibilities for the practicalities of parenting (buying clothes/making sure uniform is washed/dinner money) post divorce? So called 50/50 co-parenting still usually means one parent is responsible for the everyday admin. Also – there is one parent who can’t just suddenly get a full time job miles away because they are […]Read More
Your Relationship Guru: Celia Conrad
Your Relationship Guru: Celia Conrad Helping you heal from the pain of break-up and personal loss and create positive lasting change. Celia Conrad is a relationship expert. She has a diploma in relationship coaching, is an accredited break-up and divorce coach practitioner and master practitioner (specialising in domestic abuse), a certified grief educator and certified […]Read More
Parenting Conflict Resolution Expert: Jenni Rock Coaching
Jenni Rock Coaching Parenting Conflict Resolution Expert I help those parents to escape the war that started with their Divorce Proceedings I spent 15 years living with a very challenging person who taught me the kind of relationship I never wanted to have again. Once that ended, we had to co-parent as best we could. […]Read More
Does your Workplace have a Separating Families Policy for Divorcing Parents?
Did you know that in a 2014 study for the Nashville Business Journal, they found that in the 6 months leading up to and during the year of a divorce, an employee’s productivity is reduced by 40% and will suffer on some level for the next 7 years. Not only that, but there is an impact on the […]Read More
Infidelity? It’s none of my business
The shock of the breakup was so sudden, so extreme, that normal behaviour would have seemed inappropriate The events that lead up to it should have left clues, but they didn’t register: The bank letters addressed in his name that I didn’t open because I’d learned that it was, apparently, none of my […]Read More
A Strange Gift: Unplanned Solo Parenting It’s a January morning in 2003 and I can’t bring myself to take the kids to school. What will I say when someone asks me “How are you?” The answer, you see, is just not the stuff of polite conversation. “W E L L… My partner of […]Read More